Cracked it!

Dear Diane,
Hey! How are you?! I couldn't get a table at our usual BocBoc cafe so I am re-trying a farm shop about fifteen minutes away. I came once and it was not that good but I am giving it a second go. As you can see its more countrified than our usual place and the chairs less comfortable but it was a nice sunny drive through country to get here, and its a quite place to blog and journal for a while so that's fine.

But look, I just have to show you this, I am so excited. You know how much I have struggled with  sketchbooking ( is that a word?) and how I like the immersion in the process but tend to be really disappointed with my output at the end. Well, I declare myself 95% happy with this spread. And the 5% unhappiness only relates to the ink smudges. They happened because my Platinum Carbon pen had been on a flight and like all fountain pens tended to leak a bit on first use after landing. Must be the cabin pressure or something. I didn't notice it was on my fingers. But, then again it reminds me of being on holiday so, maybe I am only 3% unhappy.

And in a roundabout way it was the holiday that made this page so happy-making. When I was in Florence I visited an art shop looking for useful souvenirs. Anything art related I didn't already have. And I ended up buying some Softaqua watercolour brushes by Raphael because they said they held twice the amount of colour of other brushes. And boy, do they! Much of my previous dissatisfaction - even after swapping to Daniel Smith paints - was my inability to get bright solid colour and to control fine lines. Turns out it was my brushes.  I don't know if, once post don line, this iPhone snap really shows it but there is a big difference in my work with these high paint  load brushes. I love them! You can get these brushes in the USA here and the UK here.

Now I need to find a good travel holder for them:)

I had had the soiled stained notes I scribbled(about what bulbs I had planted where)  set aside to write up into my garden journal for a week. Meanwhile I was debating whether or not to sign up to the storytelling class at Sketchbook Skool, simply because I am saving up for new camera lenses and I thought maybe I should put the cash in that direction. Then, hours before the class started I signed up on a whim and watched the first class early this morning in my PJ's. I have discovered that using Apple TV to watch on the full sized screen is a very good thing to do. And of course that class, on documenting a recipe ( or effectively) a creative process inspired me to go immediately and do this page.  I was amazed when I surfaced and realised I had spent nearly two hours on it. Where did that time go?!

[interlude: My soup came and it had an onion bhaji in it which was weird but absolutely fantastically delicious! If had dot photograph because of the strong side light from a window. I  am glad I tried here again!] 

Of course, whilst falling down the creative well like that is always a good thing, at the same time its not always possible for me to find such  a long time in one go.  And that brings me back to photography.

I know you love both your camera and your sketchbook and I am eagerly awaiting the delivery of my new Olympus mirrorless camera. So, I was wondering: when you are out travelling, or indeed, if you are pottering at home, what factors influence your decision to sketch or to photograph? Do you ever do both in relation to the same subject? How does the process differ for you?

I paused watching the Sketchbook Skool videos to make some toast and thought : I should draw this toast making process. Then I thought: but then the toast will go cold! Maybe I should take clever food photographs of my toast. But then, because I am still at the point and shoot stage and eagerly awaiting proper lenses and time to read my pile of photography books, I thought: but maybe a styled photo of toast isn't actually that quick. I don't know. Guess I will find out as I learn!

It will be interesting to see how the two different ways of making an image make me feel, how I experience the different media. Because I think for me a lot of making art is about that - how it makes me feel. My Softaqua brush trial gave me a "Yes!! At Last!" feeling.  Which I think ought to be celebrated with apple and berry crumble Don't you?  I'll nip down and get them. Do you want cream or ice cream with yours?

Helen

PS Something else deeply satisfying I learned whist typing this post. If you are in iOS 8 on ipad or iPhone, if you go to settings - general - keyboard - edit you can delete that IRRITATING emoticon key on the new keyboard that I kept hitting by accident. 

Making my travel journal

Hi Diane,

How are you getting on making your journal for the Ticket to Venice class? I am so glad we signed up for this together. I thought I'd spend an hour today starting to make my signatures and was rather surprised to find when I came up for air it was over three hours later. This is very fun indeed. If messy. My studio was so beautifully tidy when I started....

I have now also signed up for Sketchbook Skool ( despite the irritating name) and as you know that will start just before I go to Bath for a fortnight. So what I wanted was a book that would reflect the kind of holiday I will have and which will have plenty of space to tuck sketches into pockets and to glue them in. I think working on loose scraps and/ or in the perforated sketchbook in my Midori Travellers book will free me from the terror of 'spoiling' a sketchbook. I will have fun combining my urban/ everyday sketching into a scrapbook style visual journal. That gets everything in in one go!
I still need more neutral pages (I think an visit to an art shop for sheets of watercolour paper might be in order one day soon) but here is some eye candy of all the fun I have had so far collating pages and adding pockets and flaps galore. All I need now is for that order of washi to arrive....!

I have some paper bags from previous trips to Bath to use ( above you see the Charndos Deli where we get bread) and I also have memorabilia from when I did a Reading Year at Mr B's Emporium of Reading Delights ( below you see a bookmark sent with a note by Mr B himself about the book choice he sent). As I shall be treating myself to a reading spa next time I go, it seems appropriate to use the wrappers and seals in which my books were posted for the journal covers.

I have stuck to my usual brown and green colours, but that suits the colour of Bath stone too. I will be doing a lot of reading so I have added scrapbook papers with letters and have ordered some similar washi tape.

Next to think about covers. I have to wait for my order of linen thread and booktape to arrive before I can bind it anyway.
So, I want to see your pages please!!

Helen.

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Balti Palace doorway

Hi Diane,
Here is the second doorway quilt I mentioned. This is the one I am most pleased with. Not much to say about it really except that its the most painterly thing I have ever done. If i had been told at school that i could paint with a credit card and my fingers maybe I would have been doing it all my life!

Here is the quilt:

And here is my inspiration picture.

I have already used the woman as a thermofax in my Brick Lane series. (Oh, there's an article about that in this months British Patchwork and Quilting which is fun,)

I am a little suprised to find myself making such literal interpretations of my photos, I have to say, but I really enjoyed doing them.
Maybe there's another one in me yet...!
Helen

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Doorway : No. 33

Dear Diane,

I am so excited we are starting our new creativity project together! After all our private emails discussing what we are and are not going to be doing let me just check I have this straight (and so readers will know too!):
1. We will take it in turns to pick a theme. The first one is your choice which is 'Doorway'.
2. We will work to that theme for a 2- 3 month period which we will set as we go along to take account of life demands.
3. Any media goes! The only rule is that we have fun exploring what we can do with that theme with the aim of interpreting it in whatever medium is calling us to play at the time.
4. There will be no grand reveal day and no specific size requirements as there were with Twelve by Twelve because this is more about is spurring each other on to learn and grow and experiment to see what we can do. However as work is done or progress is made (or not made!) we will post here about our progression for others to see.

I am actually excited that all our discussions have taken away some of the limits we first discussed. I think that we will spark off each other and that the freedom to be 'muti-potentialite artists' will bring out the best in us. I am particularly glad we will no longer be keeping secrets until the end of the theme period - our discussions about the ups and downs of creativity are really valuable to me.

As you know, as we discussed how this was going to pan out I had some studio time so I was able to get ahead and start on our theme. here is my first work that I have been dying to show you. It is called simply NO 33. The first comment I should make is that the photo illustrates the difficulty of photographing  quilt without getting distortion even when you think the camera is straight. My Dad gifted me a tripod this weekend so I am going to be retaking a lot of photos sometime soon!

This was in the early days when we talked about just doing art quilts and you suggested using a 26 x 36 format. I have to say I like that shape a lot to work with although it proved what I said all along about the one deficiency of my wet studio - the print surface is not big enough!! Its the biggest I could fit in the space of the single garage so I am not complaining but I had to paint my quilt sidewise which was interesting. I am contemplating doing what Annabel Rainbow does and buying a big easel and back board and clipping fabric to it so I can paint vertically.  Maybe you can get table easels large enough so that I can do it in the workbench rather than in the laundry space. I don't know. I shall have to trawl some art supply websites. What a hardship :)

The quilt came from a photo I took on Brick Lane when I did my original research for the big Brick Lane quilt I made last year.

here is the photo:

Dennis wants to share the copyright of this photo because he held the umbrella over my head when I took it! The reason I was in Brick Lane is that I was exploring its potential as a source of material for a theme  of Transition picked by the newly formed Etcetera group of which I am a part. You know I am fascinated with immigration and ethic groups and this picture sums up the departure of the Jewish community who were the life and soul of this area. The Brick Lane locality is now home to a big Asian community mostly from the Sylhet  region of Bangladesh as depicted ( some say inaccurately) in Monica Ali's eponymous book Brick Lane. I love that book by the way - have you read it? its so much better than the film!

Anyway, for some time I have been wanting to explore further the use of scraped paint which I use as the background for my map quilts. Like this one for example, The Roodee:

I love that technique for backgrounds but I always do it the same way and with inks not paint. I wanted to see if I could make it look like wood or the steel doors. The whole thing is painted with normal acrylic paints and a textile medium. Mostly with a credit card and my fingers with the odd touching up detail with a brush. The No33 letters are stencilled with Luminere paint. The shop, you will see is actually No 33A ,but I didn't have a small A stencil and was feeling lazy so....!!  The quilt is not perfect but it gave me enormous confidence to know that this was a technique worth pushing further. and I have another Doorway to show you but  I am going to tease you and hold that back until my next post!

To get the look of the spray painted graffiti I used oil pastels. Not oil sticks. Oil pastels. Then I wondered why I had not read about anyone using those on quilts. After three days I realised it was probably because they do not dry well. The solution? The same non-yellowing fixative you use for pastels on paper worked a treat. Stinks to high heaven so I opened all the doors and windows turned on the extractor fan, put on a mask, didn't breathe and left the room to air for ages when I used it on the quilt rather than a test fabric! I have no idea what it does to the archival quality of quilts but thats not a concern to me right now with these pieces. Getting while oil pastel all over my hands while I quilted was a big concern!

The worn posters are Bengali newspapers. The woman in the shop was most reluctant to see something so 'useless' to me when I confessed I do not speak a word of Bengali. I did try to explain the art purpose but she was still very perplexed when I left the shop! I have to say though that I didn't know when I bought the newspapers that I would use them this way. Just proves that a stock of appealing 'one day' things is an important thing to have!


The women were extracted from an entirely different photo I took on Cheetham Hill Road in Manchester where the great Asian supermarkets are. Hmm, even writing that makes me want goo and pick ups some flat breads and lassis! The front one is turning her head to talk to the other one which is why you don't see a face. When doing the scarves ( which are chiffon) I folded the fabric so it has some dimensionality but on reflection the way I allowed the tine to go from top left diagonally across the head makes her look more like she is looking at her feet. You will see in due course I tried to improve on that. I don't think it shows well in photos but the fact the women are appliquéd on but not quilted does make them stand out from the background.

I have already been inspired to make another literal doorway ( soon I will show you - soon - this post will be too long with two stories in it!)  and I will probably use painted whole cloths a lot more now I have done this. But also, I see abstract possibilities. here are three shots I took of details of the door. Like with my obsessions with shacks I see a beauty in these photos of dilapidation and decay combed with the marks of the people who live close by. Plus the compositions are interesting.

 I love this last one particularly. Who put those feathers there I wonder? And what did they intend?

So, I am excited to see what you do with this theme and where we go together. It will I am sure be a doorway into new things - did you intend that double meaning when you picked the theme?

Helen.

Battling the sketching

Dear Diane,
I loved to see your sketching kit. I imagine you out there in the Californian sun, with your plein air hat on, all serene, painting with your kit sorted in perfect ergonomic alignment. Like a surgeon,
" Number six brush!"
Your hand goes out and there it is. I imagine it to be peaceful and restful. Even the 'urban' in your sketching looks semi- bucolic with the greenery all around.
Me? Ha. Less urban sketching and urban warfare. Battling against my lack of perfect kit and the psychological warfare that goes on in my head.
First, my watercolours. (And yes, there is a U in colour. Don't even try to tell me otherwise or I shall shoot you with my spray bottle. Or I would had I not left it at home, not having a perfectly organised sketching bag yet. ) I listened to your advice. Student paints will be trouble. Invest in artist quality ones. So I ordered this set of Windsor and Newton Artist quality half pans.

It was not cheap. So I was a little foxed to find that if you unwrap the 24 half pans there is a ton of space left at the end of each line. So I budged them all up, added a white and an empty pan from an old Cotman student grade set and folded some paper up and stuffed it at the end of the row where there was still a gap but not enought of a gap for a half pan. Why would they make a 24 pan box that holds two rows of thirteen and a half half-pans?
I got over that annoyance soon enought and made a paint chart. Watercolours in a pan don't always look like they come out on paper so a reference guide as to what was where in my box seemed like a plan.

Would have worked a treat except, look what happens when you actually take your sketchers box out to sketch and open it up! What drongo designed this thing? I am not pleased. The saving grace is that the paint in the box costs a lot more if bought individually than in this piece of *$$%.
Ahem. Sorry about that. Any recommendation for an empty pallette that will hold half pans in nice and snug?
So anyway. The rest of the kit is a motley assortment of pens and water brushes in a pencil case and a Filofax. Currently an A5 Amazona. This is filled with proper Fabriano Artistico watercolour paper as recommendedby Ed from Mostly Drawing and I have so say that I like it. It takes watercolours without difficulty but still feels like paper not card. And the genius of the Filofax as sketchbook is (a) no wated time self binding books. Punch and go. Yeah! (b) No need to always carry a dedicated sketchbook. Slip a few pages of this paper into the A5s I use most often including my work ones so I always have paper. Then the kit can roll about the bottom of my handbag.
So, that is adequate, although I can see how it could be improved upon.
I am still struggling to use my kit though, mostly because I am inexpert and therefore hate the results. This weekend I went on two sketching opportunities. The first was to Cheetham Hill in Manchester where there is no semi-buccolic greenery. I actually went because wanted to take some more covert photos of people in the community for use in quilt work. Covert is not easy with a camera, especially when your skin and dress already make you stick out a mile. I was also mindful that the Asian communities are suffering increased attacks following the Woolwich murders and that they may be a bit twitchy about people photographing at the moment. So I first treated myself to a shop in the wonderful supermarkets which are remarkably cheap and stocked with exotic foods. I love to be in these shops. I thought a bag of guava jelly, arabic flat breads, paneer and spices might give me some legitimacy. Then, I sat in the sun on a low wall and looked across this road and attempted to sketch the shop. Then, whenever a saw a woman who caught my eye I would take some snaps, thinking that I could justify them as references for the sketching if anyone asked.

I had not long started when a young man came past pulling a large wire trolley full of fruit and veg. He stopped,
"Are you drawing it?"
"Trying to. I've only just started learning to sketch."
He looked across at the shop. " Oh, you picked it for the colours and stuff? Show me when I come back."
By the time he came back I had produced an excorable mess. I am not showing you. He looked at it,
"It's a good start. In a couple of months you'll be really good."
Bless him!
But isn't it funny how you seem to instinctively draw buildings and I much prefer people. Todays outting was to BocBoc where the staff tolerate me messing up their tables.

This guy was enjoying his eggs on toast.

You know how we have been talking privately about finding an artistic voice? Well, I feel that my people all look like I drew them and I can see myself improving so I am not unhappy with them even though I'd like to get better still. But my buildings and travel sketches look like they were drawn by a camel with a pen in its mouth. They make me very unhappy.

So. I have decided to treat this sketching lark as if it were a compulsory college course. It is something I should learn and I accept, like Latin, it may benefit me in indirect ways later even if I don't make it my life's passion. I am open to being suprised and hooked by it and am willing to work at it and not give up so I can give myself a passing grade. Rather than messing about in ignorance I am going to educate myself. I will persevere until the end of the year and then I will review whether I will continue or not.

I have ordered some books on basic techniques and have made a list of more advanced ones to progress through. I narrowed those down by only choosing the ones where the examples were in a style of watercolour that made me excited. (i.e not your average insipid country landscape). I did look at online courses but rejected them on cost/ unsuitable starting date/ really irritating voice and accent of instructor and the fact that watching a video makes me impatient and I tend to drift off and do something else. I prefer written instructions. Much quicker. In the process though I found many free online tutorials to work through and some short youtube clips. I am compiling a collection of journal page images to emulate. I have set out my objectives and goals so I am clear what it is I am trying to attain. And of course I wrote it all down on an assortment of nice paper in my wine zip Holborn Filofax which is just lovely to touch and makes me happy to use and which therefore offsets that useless paint box!

And, I am adopting the attitude that there are artists who use watercolours in a way that gets me interested and inspired and that if they can do it then it can't be so hard that I cannot do it, if only I decide to learn how. Then, when I feel I know what I am doing and what I use most I will address my kit again.

The books should arrive at the weekend. In the meantime, I am off to scrape orange and yellow screen inks on to fabric for a wholecloth quilt background. That I know how to do!

Love,

Helen

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Wet studio tour

The bad news is that Dennis says he is contemplating cancelling your standing invitation on the basis that you are a bad influence on me. It was all those photos of pallettes that did it. I suddenly wanted me one too :) and some good watercolour paper to boot. At the moment I am using a pencil case set of Aquatone which I tend to use by lifting the colour off with a wet waterbrush rather than 'colouring in with them' and wetting the paper. I like the ease of this and the portabilty but the downside is that they don't come in a pallette and so I tend not to carry one. That in turn means I tend not to mix colours and if I want to dilute them I end up doing it on the back of my hand. Not recommended practice I am sure!
Well, I say I am using them... Very occasionally! I know that you will say that it need not take very long but there are too many creative things I want to do all at once which individually do not take very long but together take more time than I have. But I am trying. Last week, rather than trying to beat the rush hour home I waited it out in Cafe Nero. My plan had been to do some urban sketching of buildings but of course five minutes before I left work the heavens opened. And anyway,my instinct - rather suprisingly- has been to go for people. And people sit relatively still in cafes. So this was the result.

I think it was probably better before I added the colour:

And you have seen my Tayto crisp packet.
But in reponse to me showing you that you asked was I now seeing the point of drawing ordinary things. Well, yes and no :) I get flashes of understanding then they go. I remember when we were in Kaikoura New Zealand it was tipping it down with rain with wind and, as the only thing to do there is go on the sea, all the activities were cancelled and we holed up in our flat reading. At one point the rain stopped and as I got up I saw, from the balcony a whole mountain range a short distance away that simply had not been visible through the greyness. I grabbed the camera, took a few shots, the clouds closed in again and that was all we saw of Kaikoura. Its a bit like that!
So as of the moment you asked the question, the answer was, well I have some vague recollection of why it was of vast importance that I learn to paint snack foods, but I seem to have forgotten :) I think the answer might be as simple as: its important to allow time in life to do ultimately pointless things because they renew your resources to do the .. whats the word?Pointful?.... things. But them we come back to posisble activities competing for time.
Just do one picture a day! Just a small sketch page. Thats the advice I have read so often. And it sounds tempting. Just a half hour. A quarter hour even. Trouble is, I read a lot of well meaning advice and so I know that I am also supposed to be reading, journalling, running, doing yoga, meditating, organising my cupboards, eating with my spouse ( and mindfully cleaning up afterwards),keeping in touch with friends and community and blogging. For just half an hour a day. On top of a full time job. And I'like to actually do some textile art now and again please. And maybe have a bath. ( Admittedly I cam multi task there and I do read or even meditate in the bath. But watersoluble media and baths do not seem like a plan to me! Unless, can you marble in bathwater maybe?)
So, I cannot see sketching being something I habitually do every day or even most days. But, that does not mean it cannot be done regularly. I am contemplating, now it is summer waiting out the traffic maybe once a fortnight. I do have motivation to learn:

• I trust your view that it will benefit me
• I would like to be competent enough with the media to make nice travel journals when I am off work and have time to sketch. I particularly want to sketch with you when we visit
• I like the process of learning new things and having a 'project'
• I want to own a box of colour. Thats cool!

So I have added that to my new Studies Filofax.. But thats a post for another day! For now I have to go and wrap this breakdown printed fabric in plastic to cure. I have to say this took priority over a sketch today:) I'll let you know how it turned out.

Love,
Helen.
PS You can now see the result of the breakdown printing over at My Down the Well Blog.

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The three R's

RITUAL....REORGANISATION.... REFINE

Dear Diane,
This week has been hectic at work. Early starts, late finishes, short lunches and difficult decisions. Not excatly conducive to blogging or creativity in the evenings. But I always find that the universe provides just when you need it and the God's have sent me a kind colleague who has helped me out today to allow me time to catch up on paperwork and to leave work intime to visit Boc Boc for some sanity cafe time on the way home.
I have with me a notebook I started specifically to write notes about working in a series. Page two starts with a list of topics my first entry threw up as fodder for this blog. The first on the list was "How important is ritual?"
Well, lets think. I have been aware I am not blogging and have been dithering between thinking," I need to get my act togther, my filofax out and my brain in gear and plans some posts," and thinking, "Oh, sod it. Who cares about blogs? Maybe if I have no passion for it, its something I should just let go of anyway." Then I get this precious free hour or so. I could go home but its noisy there becuase my husband is hoovering ( well, Dysoning to be accurate, but either way I know I am lucky!) so I popped in here and sat at one of my usual tables and ordered my usual snack and suddenly, ideas for blogs came pouring in and I have had to whip out the ipad and get going. It really was remarkable. That always happens in here.
So it got me thinking. I am in similar doldrums with the art making, having just finished off three big projects and being distracted wth studio construction stuff. So is there a similar ritual that I can engage to get me restarted in the studio? I am not sure I do have one and whilst just being in the studio is a good impetus it is not as much like Pavlov's bell as the arrival of toast in Boc Boc for some reason. So I am wondering. Do you have a conscious ritual to get you going? I know your Rituals quilt was all about wine tasting but knowing you I am pretty sure drinking yourself into art is not your style! But that said I used to drink a lot of a 'tea' called Dreamtime ( I think I brought you some last time I visited) until I worked out it had never seen the gate of a tea plantation and was basically delicious flavoured sugar in hot water.. I used to call it Quilting Tea! Maybe I should brew some up when I get in. I have read about people lighting candles or having a moment before an little altar but I wonder whether the 'Boc Boc effect" can be artificially created like that or if it has to be something spontaneous and natural.
In any event the second R is for Re-organisation because, even as I sip tea the fitter is in the second studio putting the lino flooring down. So lots of this week has been spent carrying things up and down from one studio to another reorganising myself into wet and dry and receiving various mail ordered items of equipment. This was just one day's mail. Our postman hates us.

So the ritual question may be accademic. It would be simply BAD to build not one but two studios and then not make art in them. So in one sense the complete overprovision of space is going to make it a requirement that I simply get out of the doldrums and create. After all, it does not take any inspiration to just dye some fabric a pretty colour does it? ( Although the research as to precisely what type of glove - medical or decorators? Latex or non? Powered or not? - might actually prevent me dying my hands fuscia yet again, can be a convenient delaying tactic.) And of course I mentioned the first world problem of whether paints to be used for design but not production belong in a dry or wet studio! I totally appreciated the enabling response that I required two sets and I will order more once the restraining order the postman has taken out to ban himself from having to come near our house has run out.
The R for Re-organisation is also applying to the sorting out of my mind though. A few months ago I set myself goals to reach by Easter ( including this totally insane plan to make a lifesized African shack which is currently deteriorating in all weathers in a park in Belgium).

So now are three huge quilts all sent off and I need to regroup and decide to do next. As part of that I journalled about what I would like my art life to look like in ten years time and worked back all the steps I neded to take to get there. In all areas I came down to the hardly startling discovery that the first step was to build a body of work. Now I have lots of quilts but I see myself in the process of to defining my voice. So I use body of work not to mean 'stuffed cupboard full of past projects' but 'a coherent consistent collection of pieces that can be recognised as being in my voice.' I was somewhat frustrated that even though I have been thinking of that for a while now I still feel that I am all over the place stylistically. And thats how I come to the third R word: Refine
So I sat down and wrote a list of the quilts I had made over roughly the last twelve months give or take. There were twelve of them ranging in size from 20x 12 inches to 90 x 84. Plus a shack! But I counted the 20/12 as one set rather than individual quilts. I then looked at each one and made a list of what I saw to be their features. I came up with this list

• Paint scraping/ stamping
• Handdyes
• Writing
• Africa theme
• Sense of location
• Socio-political message
• Shacks
• People
• Machine applique
• Hand embroidery
• Machine stitch
• Screen printing
• Use of bought african textiles

So, 13 characteristics. The least any one quilt had was seven ( the shack). The most was 12, which was my Joe Slovo Township quilt

. Of the characteristics almost all had multiple occurrences with the sense of location and the social political message being in every quilt. The weakest featured was the screen printing, which is because I have only just started to learn to use that, and the use of genuine african textiles.

It was easy to see that the list of quilts fell into two categories (a) ones which featured my own surface designed fabric and (b) those with what I call 'Magie Fabric' i.e using my stash from my friend Magie's shop of imported fabrics. What I could see clearly was that the (a) quilts were the ones I had dedicated he most design time to and that I was most invested in. I would say they were my better works. The two (b) quilts I did for fun and to please other people. Indeed I cant show you the african one that was not the shack above because it is a suprise for a friend. Plus the thing is so humungous that I can't photograph it at home!
I got two very important things from this.
1. If I need to focus down and refine more, the african fabrics have to go. Well, snippets may appear as they do on the shacks in Joe Slovo but the quilts completely of african fabric is not where my work is headed. Rather I need to be focusing more in my surface design skills.
I know this in my gut but I am fighting it a bit. I like working with Magie fabric, I like that is a collaboration with african artists who make beautiful cloth. I like suporting the fairtrade commerce that ensues. But I know that the result is my hand and the voice of Esther/ Musa et al. I believe that it is possible to work in two very distinct series, although it takes two lots of marketing if an aim is to get gallery space. Plus I know a gallery where a whole african village of life sized shacks surrounded by walls of african textile quilts would look great. And it wouldfe fun to do that. So its tempting to try to do both.

The problem is time. IF I was full time I could do that. I am not. I have worked out and tested that going full pelt with high motivation I can do about 55-60 hours most months including design and blogging and 'business time' ( like entering shows and packing quilts). That's about 35% time. On top of the early start/ late finish full time job. And I like to do other things in life too.
So the choice is: spread thin and take longer to get where I am going or give something up and build up a body of work that is narrower in scope but wider in competence and cohesion?
I know the answer ( jeez, the building of a whole surface design studio might have been a sort of a clue where my subconsious was leading me! ) but you will forgive me if I take a little time to grieve the relinquishing ( gosh there are more R words than I planned in this post!) of the easy and quick option in favour of more work, more vulnerabilty and more risk. And maybe more reward. I know that I will still use Magie fabric or other commercial fabrics, because I will allow myself some R&R time ( oh, they are just rolling forth now!) to make lap quilts and/ or kits just for fun. For example, I am booked on a retreat in a few months time where surface design work is not possible so I could use my African fabrics for fun there. And maybe the shacks will come back in surfaced designed way. Who knows. After all the reason I love those fabric IS the beautiful suface design. And Magie actually has the stamps used to make some of those wax print fabrics anyway. Plus, (she says trying to stop herself crying) quilts still need backings, and no harm will come to my refinement plan if I just sit and cuddle the african fabric from time to time...no-one ever said that not working with a certain kind of fabric meant you should not buy the stuff. Well, maybe my husband did but I am sure he didn't mean it.
2. The second thing I got from this is that finding time to to looking back and to think is a good thing to do. I saw that actually there was far more in common in my works than I thought and that was encouraging to see my progress which I coud not see as I was on the path itself. And I can see where I can place more emphasis on certain characteristics in the future and to what topics I need to dedicate my learning time.
So I am going to need some support in actually making this choice and not waking up tomorrow convinced that it is utterley wrong. Or, more likley, reaching a difficult time learning surface design and being tempted to slide into the easier route again. Or seeing something exciting at Festival of Quilts and wanting to g off ona tangent.
Right, now my life is sorted I am going to go home and finish up sorting out the studio, mix up some dyes and get going this weekend. Would you like a video tour of the studio, inside cupboards and all for the next post?
Love,
Helen.

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Visting the Tate

Dear Diane,

I know that you are laid low in your sick bed so this is a letter to entertain you and give you something to read on your Ipad which,knowing you, I am sure is on your pillow with your tissues and medication.

In my last post I promised to tell you about my visit to the Tate Liverpool to see an exhibition about drawing. As always with the Tate there was not inconsiderable scratching of the head. Both at their definitions ( how is photography drawing?) and at the quality of what is on offer. I have learned over the years how to tackle a Tate exhibition though, taking into account my nature. Which is that in museums I have great starting enthusiasm but actually the attention span of a gnat and that I don't like paying money to be taken for a ride.

My method is to walk through relatively quickly. Window shopping. I note my instinctive reactions which usually fall into three catagories:

• Ohhhh! Now thats clever, I like that.
• Blah.
• What the ...? How did that get here?

Then I walk the gallery again, not necessarily in any sensible order. The Blah stuff I tend to skip. I know.I might learn more if I didnt but .. Gnat Head. Got to do what I can do and no more. the Blah stuff is anyway usually stuff I can see the merit of but its not my style and it just doesn't trigger inspiration for my own work. So Monet, good work, lad, but will you excuse me while I go and spend time with this conceptual artist over here?

Now in this exhibition there were four artists I wrote down to show you that particularly struck me. Three of which I had not heard of before. So that list alone is worth the entrance fee.

The first one, I did know. William Kentridge. I was immediately attracted to him becuse he is South African so there is an interest before we start for me. He does animations based on drawings. Here is one of them

Clever. Amusing. There were four on a big screen. I watched one and a half. (Gnats head). He can clearly draw in the technical sense. His sketches are what I would have said good drawing was before I went. There is a video of him talking about his process here........

Oh that reminds me there was one of Henry Moore's London Blitz drawings too. Again good to look at. These works engendered in me a reaction of : sigh. If only I could do that....

Then there was Oskar Kokoshka and his London Drawings

 

I found these quite encouraging. Scribbly. I could do that. Of course if I did they would not end up in the Tate because of the mysterious and unknown art world mechanisms of designating who is an Artist and who has a nice hobby. But, last time I checked my life plan it did not include being shown in The Tate, so thats Ok. (Although, should any curators be reading this I can change my life plan at any time and it was with a great deal of postmodern irony that I failed to make my bed this morning. My contact details are in the sidebar.) But seriously, the Tate is in a great bit of Liverpool architecturally speaking and it is walkable on a lunch hour for the new job I will start in May. These pictures made me want to buy a sketchbook and plan to come out once a week to scribble draw.

Right opposite his work was stuff by a man whose name I forget, so annoying was he. He liked to lie in a field for hours at a time and then draw the interpretations of life he came up with as a result of his pastoral contemplations. He produced a white square and a blacksquare with a few pencil marks. Frankly, the man might have much of worth in his head but he was not expressing it well. My reaction to this was of the "Oh purleeese.." variety. However thinking about it later ( whilst of course lying in a puddle staring at the underside of a cow) I decided that its worth lay in the lesson it taught rather than the physical work. That lesson being: its OK to make crap art.

Actually, I am not being facetious. ( well, I am, but I have a serious point too). Fear stops me being a drawer. Fear of mediocrity. But you know this guy is not mediocre. Far, far worse. And he got into the Tate. And I presume in allowing that to happen he also got over his fear that ignorant bloggers who don't understand why in fact he is not worse than mediocre were going to take pot shots at him online. And that makes him one cool man in my opinion.

Then down the hall was Spilt Nude by Fiona Banner. This I was capitvated by. Have no idea why is a drawing but I did not care. Indeed I was pleased. Maybe I can draw after all if this is drawing.Unfortunately the online images do not make clear the text. I have no idea why this is called Split Nude though.

Finally there was Matthew Monahan with his body Electric Series. This was the one that made me want to leave. But in a good way. Leave to go home and be creative.

These very modern works look medieval. They are like rubbings, yet not. Like xrays, yet not. They are made by scraping oil coated boards with a fork which is plain original and fun. They are like the drawing kits you used to get as a kid where you scraped away layers of crayon to get white lines, yet they are not childish. And there is a whole series of them which means this man has concentration and stickablity, great and necessary qualities in an artist.

There was more stuff, but after a while we went for Pizza.

Get well soon,

Love,

Helen.

 

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